Family VIOLence/Anger counselling
, happens for a number of reasons. When it does happen it can be very difficult to regain/maintain trust and stability. The whole family can be thrown into a world of chaos and unhappiness and children in particular are affected in ways that can lead them to struggle with intimate and trusting relationships as they grow older.
A difficult thing for many people to recognise is that almost everyone is capable of abuse. Whether it is a moment of judgmentalism, yelling at the children, or slamming a door in frustration. Some people even abuse themselves.
Abuse is a form of behaviour that emerges from a feeling of discontent or a habit developed before we knew any better. Something in our lives does not feel right. Sometimes it is obvious what the issue is, but other times the feeling is vague and draining and before we know it we are snapping at people or putting others down.
If abusive behaviour becomes a habit then a person can become unable to see the impact it has on loved ones, colleagues and anyone that can be intimidated by it. When those who are impacted make an effort to hold an abusive person accountable, the abuser can become defensive and escalate unhelpful behaviours.
The abuser might feel judged and/or afraid that they will lose something, such as the relationship itself or the place they live. For some, regaining control of the situation can lead to escalation of abusive behaviour and even violence if the abused person will not cooperate.
Any form of abuse is not okay. It robs the person who is being abused of self-esteem, self-reliance and self-respect, but when it escalates to shouting, pushing, shoving or aggression it can become dangerous and its impacts are long-lasting.
Anger can be a useful emotion, it can motivate change, but when it is directed poorly it can have devastating consequences. When anger becomes abuse it is past time to reevaluate our life circumstances and figure out why we are not content.
When we can understand 'why' we are not okay, then it is possible to plan for a future in which it is possible to control unhelpful thinking, manage our feelings, and behave in ways that we can be proud of.
If anger, abusive behaviour, or violence towards others has entered your life please contact us.
